Whether a romantic break-up is amicable, tinged with the possibility of a future reconciliation, or just downright dire with all ties severed, one thing’s for certain: no split story is identical.

Some prefer to wallow in the inevitable post-break-up feelings alone, while others resort to offloading on others, or, in some cases, the internet. Scouring Reddit forums and the candid corners of TikTok has uncovered some earth-shattering relationship demises, which run a lot deeper than simply picking up the fragments of a broken heart.

Prepare to be left reeling from split stories that feature the unthinkable (poisoning), double-layered heartache (pet deaths) and sheer shamefacedness…

Cohabiting with a partner means that one of the biggest logistical minefields if the relationship ends, is the living arrangements. In the case of Reddit user Necro Corey, his deaf ex-girlfriend had moved in with him when they were teenagers. But after he ended things, admittedly because he was ‘getting tired of her’, his decision to let her stay until she found somewhere else to live had unforeseeable ramifications. One day, Corey – who described himself as an ‘a**hole with his own issues’ – accepted her offer of cooking for them.

‘She put her ear medicine in the food and poisoned me,’ he explained. ‘I spent two weeks or so bedridden and legitimately thought I was going to die.’

Unforeseen break-ups can be hard to fathom, let alone if you’re 11 weeks pregnant and discover that your partner has been unfaithful with someone you were led to believe was his cousin. Speaking to New Zealand radio station The Edge, one woman laid bare this precise heartache.

She recalled, ‘I went to the airport to pick my now ex up, and he didn’t show. So I went home, hacked into his email to see all these pictures of him with who I thought was his cousin – his heavily pregnant cousin – only to find out that’s not his cousin. That is his girlfriend in Sydney.’

After the caller admitted herself to hospital for stress (she also wasn’t eating or drinking), she later returned home to find their home stripped of everything.

She explained, ‘He’d had his family empty our house, including all of the new baby clothes that I was already starting to prepare for, because this was a wanted baby. We’d been together for five years. The only thing that was there happened to be the dining table, and that’s only because we were upgrading, and it was broken. There was nothing, not even a fridge.’

While face-to-face is universally accepted as the kindest way to break up with someone, there are some people out there who have no qualms with taking the easy way out: like writing a handwritten note. But what if you found out via a post-it that your pet’s blood was on their hands as well?

This Reddit re-teller had been dating a girl seriously for a year when he was in his mid-20s. But one night, after giving off standoffish and distant vibes, this woman then made the unusual decision to go back to her apartment instead of staying over.

The following morning, the Reddit user couldn’t find his pooch anywhere. ‘As I opened the front door, I was greeted by the sight of my dead dog on the porch, with a note from my girlfriend saying she was breaking up with me and sorry about the dog. Apparently in her haste to get away from me the night before she had accidentally run over poor Jonny Johnson, who had been lying behind her car in the driveway. Pretty much the worst thing I’ve ever experienced,’ he said.

Everyone has experienced the stomach-churning feeling after pressing ‘send’ on a text that was not to the desired contact. Usually, it’s resolved with an awkward explanation – ‘Sorry boss, my hungover woes were meant for the girl’s chat’ – and it’s good as forgotten.

Not when you’ve sent a list of reasons to break up with your girlfriend to said girlfriend.

TikToker Alex Dean explained, ‘I was going up to see my girlfriend like I did every weekend. I knew I was going to break up with her – she had no idea so I messaged her saying, “On my way, it’ll be about an hour, just leaving now.” I messaged the lad’s group chat and said, “I’m going to do it. I’ve bullet-pointed reasons I want to break up with her” and they were like, “Send us, let’s have a look.”’

It doesn’t take a genius to work out the rest. She was less than impressed, naturally, and launched into what Alex indicated to be an almighty outrage when he arrived.

Knowing someone for more than 10 years and dating them for almost three would suggest that you’re pretty well-versed in their likes, dislikes, and all the rest.

Well, Reddit writer dirtypig796’s partner decided one Thanksgiving that her eating habits – which had never wavered – were enough to call it quits. As she put it, he essentially broke up with her over vegetables.

‘I don’t eat fruit or vegetables,’ she explained. ‘On occasion, I eat carrots in soup. I never said I wouldn’t eat the turkey, potatoes, and carrots that would be served at [my ex’s] grandmother’s house.

‘A week before Thanksgiving we got into a fight because I [was] “being a brat and just need to grow up and eat the damn vegetables”. I said, “You know what I eat” but that wasn’t good enough. So he broke up with me. Over vegetables. A week before Thanksgiving. I’m in a better relationship now.’

According to World Metrics, the average person will have seven break-ups before getting married. While not all romantic ends are destined to be cordial, they do teach invaluable lessons – and hold the potential to be developed into a riveting Reddit read. Because after all, no split story is identical.