[et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ _builder_version=”4.20.4″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}” theme_builder_area=”post_content”][et_pb_row _builder_version=”4.20.4″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}” theme_builder_area=”post_content”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.20.4″ _module_preset=”default” global_colors_info=”{}” theme_builder_area=”post_content”][et_pb_text module_class=”custom-post-title” _builder_version=”4.20.4″ _module_preset=”default” header_font=”Black Han Sans|700||on|||||” header_text_align=”center” header_font_size=”46px” header_letter_spacing=”4px” custom_margin=”25px||5px||false|false” custom_padding=”0px||0px||true|false” hover_enabled=”0″ global_colors_info=”{}” theme_builder_area=”post_content” sticky_enabled=”0″]<\/p>\n
[\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text module_class=”intro-wrap” _builder_version=”4.20.4″ _module_preset=”default” text_font=”|600|on||||||” text_text_color=”#808080″ text_font_size=”16px” text_orientation=”center” hover_enabled=”0″ global_colors_info=”{}” theme_builder_area=”post_content” sticky_enabled=”0″]<\/p>\n
Green Dot<\/em>, about a woman having an affair with a married man, is set to be one of 2024\u2019s hottest novels. Its author, Madeleine Gray<\/em>, explains why the \u2018other woman\u2019 is ripe for redemption<\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_image src=”https:\/\/flatplan-plus-content.s3.eu-west-1.amazonaws.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/6\/2024\/01\/GettyImages-157200350-copy-scaled.jpg” title_text=”ABC’s %22Scandal%22 – Season Two” force_fullwidth=”on” _builder_version=”4.20.4″ _module_preset=”default” hover_enabled=”0″ global_colors_info=”{}” theme_builder_area=”post_content” sticky_enabled=”0″][\/et_pb_image][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.20.4″ _module_preset=”default” hover_enabled=”0″ global_colors_info=”{}” theme_builder_area=”post_content” sticky_enabled=”0″]<\/p>\n Riding the crimson wave of Tampongate in 1993, Camilla Parker Bowles was one of the most hated women in Britain, maybe even the world. Why? Because she was a mistress; the \u2018other woman\u2019 in Charles and Diana\u2019s marriage. Fast forward to 2023 and The Independent named Camilla the most influential woman of the year, and, oh yeah, \u2013 she was Queen. It was quite the redemption arc.<\/p>\n In 1998, Monica Lewinsky was branded a homewrecking slut after news of her affair with President Bill Clinton broke. But now, #MeToo has shifted our understanding of erotic power differentials, and Lewinsky is seen by many as a feminist icon.<\/p>\n On hit show Succession, patriarch Logan Roy is a womaniser who has had two major affairs in his two marriages. Yet rather than these women being demonised, they were invited to sit front row at Roy\u2019s funeral with his wife and ex-wife \u2013 and all were united in their grief, and in sharing the ways that Roy\u2019s sexist entitlement had hurt them.<\/p>\n All of which suggests that the much maligned mistress is now being treated with more empathy and nuance. Perhaps a vibe Green Dot, about a woman having an affair with a married man, is set to be one of 2024\u2019s hottest novels. Its author, Madeleine Gray, explains why the \u2018other woman\u2019 is ripe for redemption shift is occurring, in which we are extending compassion to those who find themselves in the role of the \u2018other woman\u2019. After all, it\u2019s not a fun position to be in. Being a mistress is understanding that your emotional needs and desires will always come second to the \u2018official\u2019 relationship. It\u2019s a morally grey position to be in, but, unless the mistress is also in another relationship of her own, she is not breaking any vows.<\/p>\n And yet, 2023 was also the year of #Scandoval, in which three stars of reality show Vanderpump Rules were embroiled in a cheating scandal. In this scenario, the \u2018side chick\u2019 was not met with empathy. Rather, Rachel \u2018Raquel\u2019 Leviss was effectively cancelled after news broke that she had slept with her friend Ariana Madix\u2019s long-term partner Tom Sandoval. Sandoval was also the target of public ire, with trolls attempting to tank his business ventures.<\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text module_class=”custom-quote” _builder_version=”4.20.4″ _module_preset=”default” header_2_font=”Libre Bodoni|||on|||||” header_2_text_align=”center” header_2_text_color=”#333333″ header_2_font_size=”40px” header_2_line_height=”1.2em” hover_enabled=”0″ global_colors_info=”{}” theme_builder_area=”post_content” sticky_enabled=”0″]<\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.20.4″ _module_preset=”default” hover_enabled=”0″ global_colors_info=”{}” theme_builder_area=”post_content” sticky_enabled=”0″]<\/p>\n When two people are in a monogamous relationship, the deal is that they don\u2019t cheat. Historically, however, it has been the mistress who has copped the most flack, and very often the man \u2013 that is, the only one in the trio who is actually cheating \u2013 escapes largely unscathed. #Scandoval is an interesting development, in that both the cheating man and the \u2018other woman\u2019 have faced serious repercussions in the court of popular opinion.<\/p>\n So why do we have such a visceral reaction to the mistress? It\u2019s a misogynist double standard that hints at an internalised Madonna\/whore complex for women as well as men. In #Scandoval, it was female fans who were most upset with Leviss. Sleeping with another woman\u2019s partner is \u2018un-feminist\u2019, a betrayal of the sisterhood. This ignores the fact that both women are being hurt by the same man\u2019s entitlement. In seeing the \u2018other woman\u2019 as a predatory threat we suggest that men have no self control and are therefore blameless.<\/p>\n Since publishing my novel Green Dot, which is told from the perspective of the mistress, I\u2019ve received countless emails and messages from readers who have been in that position. A recurring theme is that they have felt unable to confide in anyone before, because of the blanket judgement that the other woman usually receives. I have also, however, received impassioned negative Goodreads reviews from readers who refuse to engage with a protagonist who is a mistress.<\/p>\n My protagonist \u2018Hera\u2019 is named after the Greek goddess of domesticity, who punished her husband Zeus\u2019s mistresses. In naming her as I did, I wanted to explore the complexity of her position. My Hera desperately wants a family and a home to protect. She doesn\u2019t want to be a mistress, but she is one. She\u2019s in love. There are more and more novels depicting affair dynamics with this kind of nuance, from Frances in Sally Rooney\u2019s Conversations With Friends to Edie in Raven Leilani\u2019s Luster.<\/p>\n So is the mistress finally having her moment? It\u2019s undeniable that there is a shift occurring in terms of how we represent her. Hopefully, what comes with this is a redirecting of our anger. Mine is towards the man \u2013 and I think yours should be too.<\/p>\n \u2018Green Dot\u2019 is out now (\u00a316.99, W&N)<\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][et_pb_divider color=”#111111″ divider_position=”center” divider_weight=”2px” module_class=”custom-divider” _builder_version=”4.20.4″ _module_preset=”default” custom_margin=”0px||0px||false|false” custom_padding=”0px||0px||false|false” global_colors_info=”{}” theme_builder_area=”post_content”][\/et_pb_divider][et_pb_text module_class=”credit-texts” _builder_version=”4.20.4″ _module_preset=”default” text_font=”|||on|||||” text_orientation=”center” hover_enabled=”0″ global_colors_info=”{}” theme_builder_area=”post_content” sticky_enabled=”0″]<\/p>\n Photo: <\/b>Getty<\/p>\n [\/et_pb_text][\/et_pb_column][\/et_pb_row][\/et_pb_section]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" So is the mistress finally having her moment? It\u2019s undeniable that there is a shift occurring in terms of how we represent her.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":2079,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_et_pb_use_builder":"on","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","_lmt_disableupdate":"","_lmt_disable":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[8],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2074","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-feature"],"acf":[],"modified_by":"kschwarz","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/flatplanplus.io\/grazia\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2074","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/flatplanplus.io\/grazia\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/flatplanplus.io\/grazia\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/flatplanplus.io\/grazia\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/7"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/flatplanplus.io\/grazia\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2074"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/flatplanplus.io\/grazia\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2074\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2086,"href":"https:\/\/flatplanplus.io\/grazia\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2074\/revisions\/2086"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/flatplanplus.io\/grazia\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2079"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/flatplanplus.io\/grazia\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2074"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/flatplanplus.io\/grazia\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2074"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/flatplanplus.io\/grazia\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2074"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}\u2018It\u2019s a misogynist double standard that hints at an internalised Madonna\/whore complex for women as well as men\u2019<\/h2>\n