Is Reverse Cowgirl The Most Feminist Sex Position Ever? Here’s What The Experts Say
Here’s how to master reverse cowgirl, and avoid the ‘dangers’ involved…
Words by Georgia Aspinall
The risk of injury probably isn’t something you tend to worry about during sex. But it turns out that even if you’re not getting particularly adventurous in the bedroom, there’s still a chance that a spontaneous one night stand or Wednesday night booty call could end up in a trip to A&E. Certain sex positions are more risky than others, however, and a viral TikTok that has recently resurfaced created by NHS surgeon Dr Karan Raj, who claims that there’s one that is by far the most dangerous: the reverse cowgirl sex position.
According to Dr Raj, reverse cowgirl is responsible for 50% of penile fractures, which are as uncomfortable as they sound. If you know anything about the male anatomy, you might be wondering how exactly penises can break, given that they are boneless. But apparently, ‘erratic thrusting’ can lead to the penis being crushed by the female pubic bone, leading to tissue tear and some serious discomfort.
Plus, a 2021 study found that penile fractures can lead to ‘aubergine’ deformities, so it’s worth thinking twice before opting to go on top. Although there is also research to show that various sex positions are potentially risky, with a 2017 study from the International Journal of Impotence naming doggy-style as the most dangerous.
So, what exactly is reverse cowgirl position?
According to sex and relationship expert Annabella Knight, ‘the reverse cowgirl sex position typically involves the man lying on his back while the woman straddles his hips, but instead of facing one another as per the cowgirl position the woman turns around and faces the man’s feet.’
Pro tip: some people in the receiving position prefer to bend their legs, so that the person on top can hold onto their knees or thighs – remember, stability is key here!
In case you’re still confused, here’s a visual example of reverse cowgirl (demonstrated by dummies of course)…
In his TikTok, Dr Raj explains that most accidents occur in this position when ‘the movements of the two parties are not in sync’, so make sure to communicate with your partner when trying this position out. But if we put aside salacious headlines, how dangerous is reverse cowgirl really?
‘The reverse cowgirl can pose dangers, in some cases, the penis can be injured if you’re a little too enthusiastic with the thrusting,’ confirmed Annabelle Knight. ‘If this is the case there’s a risk that the penis can fall out and then be sat on. But fear not, because as long as you and your partner keep an open dialogue, take your time, and embrace sensuality, then this position shouldn’t give you too much trouble.’
Okay, so in order to avoid any potential injuries, communication is key. Phew! Now that we can put our penile fracture fear aside, let’s talk about how good reverse cowgirl is – because seriously, when it comes to the best sex positions for women, reverse cowgirl is up there.
Why is the reverse cowgirl position so good for women?
‘A lot of us are aware of the “pleasure gap” when it comes to sex. This gap usually means that women can get a bit of a bum deal, however, this position has the potential to change that as the woman has complete control,’ explains Annabelle. ‘She’s in charge of the angle, the pace, the depth… everything. The man can help by thrusting his pelvis upward, but in reality, this position is all about the woman riding the man. When it comes to the reverse cowgirl she’s in the driver’s seat … or the saddle in this case!’
Reverse cowgirl is great for people who like to feel in control during sex then. And there’s plenty of opportunities for clitoral stimulation, too whether you want to use a clitoral vibrator on yourself or have your partner reach around with their hands or with toys – teamwork makes the dream work, right?
Here’s how to master reverse cowgirl
Annabelle agrees that sex toys are key to making reverse cowgirl an ever better sex position. ‘Definitely include a sex toy into the mix,’ she says. ‘As the “rider” you’ve got complete control over your pleasure. It’s pretty much a hands-free position so make the most of it by adding a clitoral stimulator to the mix. As well as expanding your potential for pleasure you can expand your partner’s too, as you’ll have access to the sensitive spot between the base of the penis and the anus, this is called the perineum and is packed with pleasurable nerve endings.’
Of course, there is the tiny issue that you, as the rider, as also doing most of the work. So, for my fellow pillow princesses that aren’t used to putting a shift in during sex, how do you maintain momentum when you start to get tired during reverse cowgirl?
‘Lay back and relax,’ advises Annabelle. ‘If you’re getting a little tired simply lean backwards so that your back is resting on your partner’s chest. You can extend your legs out, or, if you’re bendy keep them where they are. This brings a whole new level of intimacy to the position as well. You’ll be physically closer to one another and the added skin-on-skin sensations will provide extra sensuality too.’
Essentially, laying back while in reverse cowgirl will allow your partner to take control. If they hold you in place and start thrusting themselves, you can simply lie still for awhile and be the receiver instead. Pro tip: instead of lying flat on top of them, put your feet down on the bed and push your hips to the sky so you’re almost in a crab position. This will help stabilise you and provide more room for your partner to thrust from underneath you (your partner can hold onto your hips to keep you even more still). Make sure when you lie back to move your head next to your partners, so they can see your entire body on top of them, it makes things even steamier!
Ultimately, mastering a certain sex position is all about what feels good for you and your partner, so don’t feel like you have to stick to every rule or maintain a certain ‘sexy’ pose – make the position work for you, not you work for it. It’s all about pleasure remember, not performance!
Photo: Getty; Unsplash